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Oksana Maslovskiy is an award-winning artist, an internationally adored fashion model, and one of the most infamous serial killers this country has ever known. She enjoys murdering pretty young men with a nine-inch blade, cutting them open and admiring their delicate insides. It's the only way she knows how to be intimate with another human being. But one day she meets a victim who cannot be killed. His name is Gabriel--a mysterious immortal being with a deep desire to save Oksana's soul. He makes her a deal: if she promises to never kill another person again, he'll become her eternal murder victim.
What at first seems like the perfect relationship for Oksana quickly devolves into a living nightmare when she discovers that Gabriel enjoys being killed by her just a little too much. He turns out to be obsessive, possessive, and paranoid that she might be murdering other men behind his back. And because he is unkillable, it's not going to be easy for Oksana to get rid of him.
As She Stabbed Me Gently in the Face is a metaphor for a bad relationship, told in the form of a sociopathic killer's affair with an even more sociopathic victim. From the mind of Wonderland Book Award winner Carlton Mellick III, author of Hungry Bug and Quicksand House, comes one of the strangest and most gruesome love stories ever put to print.
- Sales Rank: #1090809 in Books
- Published on: 2015-01-01
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.50" h x .32" w x 5.51" l, .40 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 136 pages
From the Back Cover
Praise for Carlton Mellick III
"Easily the craziest, weirdest, strangest, funniest, most obscene writer in America." -- GOTHIC MAGAZINE
"Carlton is an acquired taste, but he hooks you like a drug." --HUNTER SHEA, author of Forest of Shadows
"The most original novelist working today? The most outrageous? The most unpredictable? These aren't easy superlatives to make; however, Carlton Mellick may well be all of those things, behind a canon of books that all irreverently depart from the form and concepts of traditional novels, and adventure the reader into a howling, dark fantasyland of the most bizarre, over-the-top, and mind-warping inventiveness." --EDWARD LEE, author of Header
"Carlton Mellick III is a genius with an insanely beautiful imagination." --JOE AUGUSTYN, writer of Night of the Demons
"Carlton Mellick III has the craziest book titles... and the kinkiest fans!" --CHRISTOPHER MOORE, author of The Stupidest Angel
"If you haven't read Mellick you're not nearly perverse enough for the twenty first century." --JACK KETCHUM, author of The Woman and The Girl Next Door
"Carlton Mellick III is one of bizarro fiction's most talented practitioners, a virtuoso of the surreal, science fictional tale." --CORY DOCTOROW, author of Little Brother
"Mellick's career is impressive because, despite the fact that he puts out a few books a year, he has managed to bring something new to the table every time... Every Mellick novel is packed with more wildly original concepts than you could find in the current top ten New York Times bestsellers put together." --VERBICIDE
"Mellick's guerrilla incursions combine total geekboy fandom and love with genuine, unbridled outsider madness. As such, it borders on genius, in the way only true outsider art can." --FANGORIA
"Bizarre, twisted, and emotionally raw--Carlton Mellick's fiction is the literary equivalent of putting your brain in a blender." --BRIAN KEENE, author of The Rising and Dead Sea
"I'm a huuuuge Bizarro fan. This new strain of cheerfully transgressive weird fiction is to me the most vibrant, exciting, genre-mangling scene in all of strange literature today. And no one holds dominion over this blossoming underground phenomenon like the godfather of Bizarro, Carlton Mellick III. With the most impressive sideburns in imaginative lit since Isaac Asimov, and a brain that squirts out more shamelessly playful originality in any given chapter than most artists will accomplish in their entire lives, he's the poster boy. The Elvis. As well he should be." --JOHN SKIPP, co-author of The Bridge
"It's not unusual to blow through a Mellick book in one sitting. They're fast-paced with an endless number of surprises, making it tough not to keep turning pages. When the end comes, I'm left with that done-too-soon feeling that I always love experiencing." --RAZORCAKE
"A wormhole of disturbing surrealism and absurd satire." --VICE MAGAZINE
"Carlton Mellick III exemplifies the intelligence and wit that lurks between its lurid covers. In a genre where crude titles are an art in themselves, Mellick is a true artist." --THE GUARDIAN
"His fiction blends bizarre scenarios mixed with horror, action, and even more bizarre actions to create fiction that toes the line between the absurd and the dark places of the mind... Shocking yet entertaining" --THE EXAMINER
"I imagine Mellick as a Willy Wonka-type character, someone with personal access to another world, a world of his own creation, but due to its mind-bending energy, he's lost control of it, and it continues to thrive even without him there to pull the strings. And I like the idea of that." --BOOKIE MONSTER
"The imp of the perverse." --3AM MAGAZINE
"Just as Pop had Andy Warhol and Dada Tristan Tzara, the Bizarro movement has its very own P. T. Barnum-type practitioner. He's the mutton-chopped author of such books as Electric Jesus Corpse and The Menstruating Mall, the illustrator, editor, and instructor of all things Bizarro, and his name is Carlton Mellick III." --DETAILS MAGAZINE
"Discussing Bizarro literature without mentioning Mellick is like discussing weird-ass muttonchopped authors without mentioning Mellick." --CRACKED.COM
Most helpful customer reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Who wants a CM3 murder-fetish book?
By S.T. Cartledge
In true Carlton Mellick form, here's another book that's wild, original, and entertaining as hell. The thing to remember about a guy with a decent fan base and forty-something books to his name is that each fan is going to take away something different from his body of work. You could argue which books are better than which and for what reasons, but really, after more than fifteen years publishing bizarro books, Carlton Mellick rarely disappoints. By now you know what you're getting into. Crazy ideas backed up with decent stories, which more often than not work together to make each story unique from all the others.
As She Stabbed Me Gently In the Face is a story about a serial killer who hides in plain sight as an artist whose exhibitions are deadly. They don't kill people, but they easily could. The serial killer is a sort of femme fatale character, a strong female protagonist (antihero?) who has a fetish for death. The narrative follows her killing habits as an immortal being sacrifices himself so that she can kill him over and over again without the need to properly kill innocent young men. This storyline is framed around a journalist who tracked her down in order to report her story. With the usual twists and turns and unimaginable plot developments you come to expect from a Carlton Mellick story, As She Stabbed Me is a story about death and lust, about people having the desire to save other people, about love and sacrifice, and the visceral horror that comes with the territory of being a serial killer.
There's plenty of weird horror in this one for fans of Clusterf**k, but with a sinister overtone that's sort of American Psycho-ish, and with the whole murder-fetish thing hanging over it.
2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
KOKA FRUIT KILLS!!!! JUST SAY NO!!!
By Teresa
I was unsure about this book at first, mostly because CMIII seemed unsure about it in his intro. However, now that I've read it, I have to say this is my new favorite CMIII book. I can see it's gotten some pretty negative reviews (and I do go a little heavy handed with the 5 star ratings sometimes, but I love most books I read, just in different ways), and I'm finding that odd. I really feel like this is one of his strongest works to date. I LOVED the way Oksana told her story within the book. I've always been a fan of the ole 'story within a story' device. So the set-up was different than anything he's done for a long time, and I enjoyed the change of pace.
The narrative itself was amazing. Maybe I'm morbid; I don't know. But I absolutely enjoyed CMIII's foray into true horror. Although it's not horror exactly. It's hard to explain! Clusterf*ck and Apesh*t were funny horror stories...this one isn't funny at all, but it's a detailed glimpse into the mind of a killer, and I love books with that theme. The dynamic between Oksana and Edward is fun, and I love the little twist ending (yes, there's a surprise!).
But let's be honest...if you're a huge CMIII fan, you're going to read and enjoy this book one way or another. If you HAVEN'T read CMIII, I would consider this a good starter book, although it ISN'T typical of his other writing, so if you don't like it, keep trying more of his books...one of the 45 or so he's written will be bound to please you!
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
Bizarro King Takes On Horror
By moof3r
Oksana Maslovskiy is an artist, a model, and a gorgeous woman. But this woman has a dark side to her, behind all the glitz and glamor she holds dear. She is a serial killer, and is very good at it. She preys on unsuspecting young men, taking them away from society only to cut open their chests to peer at what lays inside. Then one night Oksana meets a young man by the name of Gabriel, and her life changes. You see, Gabriel came back to life after she viciously murdered him. Oksana freaks out, she can't believe her eyes. Then Gabriel tells her the truth, that he is an angel, sent to help her. He offers her a deal, that she can kill him as much as she wants, so long as she doesn't kill anyone else. But what happens when the victim starts enjoying the killing? How far is too far for Oksana, and what could be the breaking point of poor Gabriel?
Carlton Mellick III, grandmaster of the bizarro genre, comes at us with his latest release like, well, a knife to the face. This tale of brutal slayings mixed with horrific sexual encounters puts Carlton right up there with horrors best in this realm. I was quite surprised to realize how brutal Carlton was going to make this journey, and I regret nothing about going along for the ride. I would highly recommend this new novella to the horror genre, as it takes us away from his usual bizarro fare that some in the horror field aren't huge on, and plants you firmly in the arms of a horror tale. I'm going to give this one a B+, and think you should give it a chance, even if his name isn't on your shelf yet.
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